What Giving Birth Taught Me About My Savior

So.. this is going to be super long. But I mostly just want to write down all of these details so that I don't forget this crazy and amazing experience. :) But before I tell you about what giving birth has taught me about my Savior, I need to first give you the whole story.

Around January 12th, I started to get REALLY itchy in the palms of my hands and the soles of my feet. I noticed that it was getting worse, especially at night, so I decided to call my midwife. I called Friday morning and left a message, but didn't hear back. So I decided to wait until my appointment that following Tuesday. At the appointment, my midwife decided to do some blood work to see what was going on. She told me to then come back on Thursday, January 19th, to go over the results. My midwife was gone both times that I went in that day because she was delivering babies, so I just talked to the nurse. She told me that I had tested positive for ICP or Intrahepatic Cholestasis of Pregnancy. It's a liver condition that affects the flow of bile salts. Instead of bile salts going to the stomach to help digest food, they build up in the bloodstream and get deposited in the hands and feet. So that's what caused my itchiness! My nurse then told me that the midwife would call me as soon as she could. So Dakota and I went home and waited.

Dakota left for weights around 3:30p.m. and my midwife called me around 4p.m. She told me that with such high numbers of bile salts in my blood work, there was no need to keep me pregnant any longer. She was worried about Maleea because all of the bile salts in the blood could come through the umbilical cord and her body wouldn't be able to process them, which put her at risk of a still birth. So I called Dakota and he came home early and then we left for the hospital! 

When we got to the hospital, they gave me a pill to soften my cervix. Contractions started right away and got worse and worse as time went on. Our Doula, Robyn, came at about 3a.m. and helped SO much. I really wanted a natural birth, so she helped Dakota and me to relax and breathe through the contractions. My water broke around 4a.m., so I was hoping that I was going to be done soon! But not so much. Around 9a.m. I was completely exhausted and needed something to help ease the pain. They gave me some pain meds so that I'd be able to rest a little bit. I woke up after a little while and the contractions were so strong. They kept checking to see how far I was dilated, but I was hardly even progressing. So around noon I decided to get an epidural. It took away the contraction pains, but I was still having terrible back labor. I tried to rest a little, but I was just so uncomfortable and numb from the waist down. Finally, around 5:30p.m., the nurse came in and checked me again and said that we were ready to start pushing! By this point, I was so exhausted and didn't know if I'd even be able to push. But I tried! I ended up pushing for a little less than an hour before little Maleea made her appearance. :) She was born at 6:38p.m., after 25 long hours of labor. She weighed 7lbs 8oz and was 20 1/4 inches long. 

As I was holding Maleea, the midwife told me that I needed to push again so that we could deliver the placenta. I pushed and then started to get light headed. I looked at my midwife and she had a worried look on her face. I told them that I was light headed and that I was about to pass out, so they put the oxygen mask on me and kept telling me to stay with them. The doctor then came in and I still had no clue what was happening. They gave me a bunch of medications through my IV and the doctor went to work. The room was full of people and I thought I was seriously going to die. The doctor finished up and the chaos seemed to settle down a little bit. They then told me that my placenta broke and that I was bleeding a lot. Normally, people lose about 200cc's of blood, but I lost 1200cc's! It was crazy, to say the least. So the doctor got all of the pieces of the placenta out of me and then stitched me up because apparently, I tore in two places because Maleea came superman style with her hand up by her head. 

After a little while, the nurse and Dakota helped me to get up and go to the bathroom. When we got in there, I almost blacked out. So they put me in a wheelchair and took me to another room. They helped me into the bed and I just fell asleep. They woke me up a few hours later to try and help me to the bathroom again. The nurse left for a second and then I almost passed out again. She came in, found me kneeling on the floor, and in a panicked voice asked me if I was ok. I told her that I just needed to take a little break. Haha. She then helped me get up and get back into bed. She came back a few minutes later and told me that they thought I should get a blood transfusion. So they got everything ready and gave me a transfusion from around 2a.m.-4a.m. I honestly thought I was never going to be able to sleep again. Haha. 

We stayed in the hospital until Sunday afternoon and then we were able to take little Maleea home. I was really weak and pretty sore, but so glad to be home. After a few days, I broke out into a rash and was super itchy. But this time, it was all over my arms, legs, and stomach. Apparently I was having an allergic reaction to something, but who knows what because of the long list of medications that they gave me. The rash finally went away after about a week though. So I was super grateful for that. 

So what does Maleea's birth story have to do with what I learned about my Savior? Well let me tell you about the insights that I had in Sacrament meeting yesterday. As the bread and water were being blessed and passed, I kept thinking about Maleea's birth. I thought about how difficult it was for me, but how grateful I was to finally have her here. Then the words of a hymn popped into my head. I grabbed a hymn book and started flipping through the pages looking for it. I finally found it, page 181, Jesus of Nazareth, Savior and King. 

In verse two it says, 

"While of this broken bread

Humbly we eat,

Our thoughts to thee are led

In rev'rence sweet.

Bruised, broken, torn for us

On Calvary's hill--

Thy suff'ring borne for us

Lives with us still."

Bruised. 

Broken. 

Torn. 

I thought again about Maleea's birth, during which I experienced all three of those things. I had bruises from the IV's that I was given. My placenta had broke, causing me to hemorrhage. I tore because Maleea's hand was right by her head when she came out. 

Then I thought about how I experienced not even a small fraction of what the Savior experienced for me. It brings tears to my eyes when I think about how incredibly painful that must have been for Him. In the Garden of Gethsemane, the Savior literally bled from every pore. 

In Luke 22:42-44 it says, 

"42Father, if thou be willing, remove this cup from me: nevertheless not my will, but thine, be done.

43 And there appeared an angel unto him from heaven, strengthening him.

 44 And being in an agony he prayed more earnestly: and his sweat was as it were great drops of blood falling down to the ground."

These scriptures show so much about Christ's character. He suffered more than man can suffer because of the perfect love that He has for each and every one of us. He wanted the pain to go away, yet was willing to do God's will so that He could provide the way for us to return home someday. 

I felt so weak after all of the blood that I lost, but just like Heavenly Father sent an angel to strengthen Christ in His time of need, He did the same for me. I was able to receive donated blood to strengthen and help me.

I'm so grateful for my Savior who understands completely. I know that He is always there for us and will always strengthen us in our time of need. He truly does make weak things become strong. (Ether 12:27) 

Big News!

Well, a lot sure has happened in the last few months! One of the biggest things being that Dakota and I found out that we're pregnant!
 
We were all sorts of excited!.. and scared. :)

The first trimester was kind of the worst though. I was exhausted ALL the time. I literally went to work and then came home and slept for a few hours every day. I also had to have a snack and ice cold water by my bed for when I'd wake in the middle of the night. For some reason I was super hungry.
Towards the end of the first trimester the veins in my legs started to get super achy. It turns out that the blood flow in my legs weren't too great because I was constantly on my feet. So I bought compression socks, and let me tell you, they have worked miracles. :)

Second Trimester was super great because I could start feeling the baby move and we were finally able to find out the gender!







We were SO happy and in love with this little girl already. :) We decided to name her Maleea, a name that I actually found while I was on my mission. I had read it in a talk that I was studying one morning and thought, "I'm totally going to name my daughter that one day!" So I wrote it down so that I wouldn't forget. Little did I know that "one day" would come so fast! Ha.

Every night before we went to bed, Dakota and I would pray for little Maleea. One of the first nights that we prayed for her by name, she started kicking. I can't even explain it, but it was one of the coolest experiences! She knew that we were praying for her! And I think she let us know that she liked her name. ;)

So here we are in our third trimester. Maleea is getting pretty big! I think the worst part so far has been trying to get comfortable at night. I toss and turn and keep Dakota up. So that's the pits! But we'll make it through it. I love that Maleea is so active though. It's so fun to watch and feel her move all over the place. I swear she just does summersaults all day long. I'm sure we'll have our hands full with this one! Ha. But we are beyond excited to add her to our little family.

“Motherhood is not a hobby, it is a calling. You do not collect children because you find them cuter than stamps. It is not something to do if you can squeeze the time in. It is what God gave you time for.” - Rachel Jankovic 

Twice Baked Potatoes

I've been terrible at posting recipes on here! So here's one to make up for that. :) 

I usually scroll through Pinterest daily and find recipes that look good and then tweak them a little bit to make them my own. (And usually healthier) But this recipe I didn't have to change at all!

Don't they look delicious? They're Twice Baked Broccoli and Cheese Potatoes. They were flavorful  and so easy to make!  They come from this website:

http://preventionrd.com/2014/04/broccoli-and-cheddar-stuffed-baked-potatoes/

Try them out for yourself! 

The recipe is: 

INGREDIENTS

• 2 large russet potatoes, cleaned and dried
• ½ cup nonfat plain Greek yogurt
• 2 oz (1/2 cup) 2% cheddar cheese, shredded
• 1½ cups frozen cut broccoli
• ½ tsp salt
• ¼ tsp black pepper

INSTRUCTIONS

1. Preheat oven to 400 F. Place potatoes on a baking sheet and bake for 1 hour and 15 minutes; remove from oven and allow to cool slightly.
2. Cut potatoes in half length-wise. Using a spoon, remove fleshy insides of potatoes to a medium bowl, leaving ⅛ to ¼ inch potato skin. To the potato flesh, add remaining ingredients and mix well. Stuff the mixture into each potato half, mounding the mixture and lightly packing.
3. Reduce oven temperature to 375 degrees and return potato halves to the baking sheet. Bake stuffed potatoes for 20-25 minutes. Serve hot.

Our Story

Where does the time go?? A year ago on the 11th my very best friend got home from his mission for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. WHAAAT?!

On May 29, 2013 Dakota left for his mission to Busan, South Korea. ONE WEEK after High School graduation.

I was devastated to say the least. Excited, yes. But scared out of my mind.

What was going to happen?

Would we work out?

So many questions.

But I had faith and kept going. Or at least tried to. :)

The day Dakota left was one of the worst days of my life. I cried and cried and stayed in my bed all day long.

I just wanted to be with my best friend.

I stared at the countdown on my phone and wished the days would go by faster, but they didn't.

Then I got my first letter from him! I was ecstatic and read it over and over again. :)

Time went on and I got more letters and pictures as well. I LOVED seeing his face. :)

I went off to college for a semester and then....

I decided to go on a mission myself!

I wanted to go to Korea, but instead...

I went to Federal Way, Washington! ;)

It was BEAUTIFUL!! And I met the most amazing people.

I can't even explain what an incredible experience it was. I found out for myself that my Savior lives and loves me. I felt the Spirit lead and guide my companion and I to where we needed to go and who we needed to talk to. I saw the gospel bring hope into the lives of others. To put it simply, the restored gospel of Jesus Christ changes people for the better if they will choose to accept it. 

I also made some friends that I will love my entire life. :) 

So fast forward 18 months of joy, heartache, smiles, and tears...

And I came home! No, Dakota was not at the airport. He had football practice, so we wouldn't be able to see each other until the next day. In my last email home, he told me that he'd come to my house on Tuesday night after he got done with football practice. But I sure as heck wasn't going to wait any longer. So on Tuesday, my dad and I went and got me a cell phone and then I headed down to Pocatello to surprise Dakota. :) I hadn't even talked to him because I wanted it to be a complete surprise! So I stalked him.. with the help of his mom. :) 

I watched the end of his practice from a distance and then walked around trying to find him. I ended up running into one of his friends who also plays football and asked him where Dakota was. He was like, "WOAH! What are you doing here?? Dakota is going to be so surprised!" Haha. He then told me that Dakota was in the locker room trying to shower and change real fast so that he could come and see me! So I went out to the parking lot and ran to his car. By this time my heart felt like it was going to beat right out of my chest. I was SO nervous but couldn't wipe the smile off of my face. It had been a long 2.5 years without my best friend and I was FINALLY going to be able to see him again! 

So I sat in his car for what seemed like an eternity as he showered and changed out of his sweaty football clothes. Then I saw him. I filmed him walking out of the locker room doors and walk towards his car. When he was about 50 feet away he spotted me and started jogging my way. I got out of the car and we both ran towards each other and embraced in a big ol' hug. 

He was shocked and pretty speechless. All he could say was, "What are you doing?!"

Basically, it was the greatest thing ever. 

You could say we were pretty happy to see each other again. ;) 

Fast forward again to October 9th. (10 days after I got home)

We took the razor out to 4th of July Canyon! 

It was so much fun!! And absolutely beautiful. :) 

And then... 

This happened. :D 

Yeah, we get things done. :) Haha. You could say we're crazy.. but I just think we're crazy in love. When you know, you just know. 

Dakota and I were married about a month and a half after I got home, on November 20, 2015. 

I know with all of my heart that the same church that Jesus Christ established is on the earth today, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Because of our membership in this church, Dakota and I were able to be sealed together FOREVER in the Temple of the Lord. It has definitely been the greatest blessing of my life! We're not perfect, but this gospel is. And I'm so glad that I get to have this handsome man by my side for the rest of eternity. We're striving to be the best that we can be by coming unto Christ.

 

I love you Dakota!! Happy 6 months. :) 

The Savior's Love

I feel like I've learned a lot about love these last few weeks. Dakota and I have been writing on our marker board almost every day, and it has been so much fun! I've learned that a simple act of kindness can truly go a long ways. Last week I was trying to finish up all of my homework in time and was getting a little frustrated with it. Dakota left me alone and went and did all of the dishes and then came into the living room with some cookies and milk. It was simple, but I really appreciated it! I love that he observes and then serves me as well as those around him. He really loves everyone!

We then went to his parent's house this last week and I spent a lot of time doing homework. So I was pretty boring... but Dakota got all of our laundry done and folded it all while I was doing work! He even came in and out of the room a few times to check up on me. He seriously is the sweetest guy I have EVER met.

This last week Dakota and I decided to more fully study the life of our Savior as we approached Easter Sunday. It truly is a humbly experience to learn all that Christ did in His earthly ministry. He spent His time teaching the people in parables and serving those that were in need of His help. In Matthew 22 it talks about the question about tribute. Christ basically tells the people to give Caesar what is his, but most importantly, to give God what is His (OURSELVES). As we pondered that we both knew that we needed to be better at serving those around us. Then on Friday evening we went and visited Dakota's grandparents. As we were talking, they told us that they needed to go help one of their friends move, and that they would be back soon. We told them that we'd love to help and tagged along. We were able to serve a lady that was in desperate need of some help. Because of her health, she couldn't move all of her belongings! This may seem like an inconvenience to some, but it was such a great experience. I knew that there was nowhere else that I would've rather have been than serving that lady when we did. It truly just made our Easter experience that much greater!

I know that we come to know our Savior as we follow His example and serve as He did. I know that just as the Proclamation says, "The family is ordained of God. Marriage between man and woman is essential to His eternal plan." And also that "Happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when founded upon the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ." Our Savior is the way to peace and happiness if we will but follow and come unto Him.

Love

Have you ever taken the love languages test before? Well, I hadn't until about yesterday. You can find an online quiz for it here. So anyways, after I took the test I immediately got my results back. It told me that I scored high in both acts of service and physical touch. Which I'd say is pretty accurate! Last week Dakota cleaned the whole house for me because he knew that I had a ton of homework. It was thee sweetest thing ever! He's seriously just a giant teddy bear. And who doesn't love to hug a giant teddy bear?! I know I sure do. :) Ha. I'm grateful that he shows his love for me each and every day.

For my Eternal Family class this week we had to take the love language test and then figure out someone else's as well. So I had Dakota take the test and his highest scoring one was words of affirmation. After we figure someone else's out, we're supposed to do things to show that person in their love language just how much we love them.

I came up with this super simple way to write down the reasons why I love Dakota. I bought a cheap frame and dry erase markers from the dollar store and made this!

This is what it looks like in this little phone slot that we have in our house. But clearly we don't use it for a phone.. ha.

In the 6th paragraph of the proclamation it says, "HUSBAND AND WIFE have a solemn responsibility to love and care for each other and for their children. “Children are an heritage of the Lord” (Psalm 127:3). Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, and to teach them to love and serve one another, observe the commandments of God, and be law-abiding citizens wherever they live. Husbands and wives—mothers and fathers—will be held accountable before God for the discharge of these obligations."

I absolutely love this paragraph. We all need to love and feel loved as well! So I challenge you all to show someone each day just how much you love them. :) 

Faithful

This week in my Eternal Family class we have been talking about the law of chastity. In the fourth paragraph of the Proclamation it states, "THE FIRST COMMANDMENT that God gave to Adam and Eve pertained to their potential for parenthood as husband and wife. We declare that God’s commandment for His children to multiply and replenish the earth remains in force. We further declare that God has commanded that the sacred powers of procreation are to be employed only between man and woman, lawfully wedded as husband and wife." 

So I've been pondering that lately and why it's so important for us to keep the law of chastity which basically is not having sex before marriage and being completely faithful to your spouse after marriage. 

In the world today, a lot of people don't see this need for this commandment! They think that they can do whatever they want and sleep with however many people they please. But that's not God's ways. He wants us save ourselves for the one that we will be married to for time and all eternity! 

In his talk entitled "Of Souls, Symbols, and Sacraments", Elder Jeffery R.Holland said,"Sexual union is . . . a sacrament of the highest order, a union not only of a man and a woman but very much the union of that man and that woman with God." Our relationships truly should be between us, our spouse, and God. Together with our spouse, God has given us the power to create life and bring His children into this world. It's such an amazing opportunity we have! But we have to take this responsibility seriously. We have to provide a safe environment for these precious souls to come into, and that is in a home where a husband and wife are legally married. 

In that same talk, Elder Holland goes on to say, "we will never be more like God at any other time in this life than when we are expressing that particular power. Of all the titles He has chosen for Himself, Father is the one He declares, and creation is His watchword–especially human creation, creation in His image." 

I know that we are God's most prized possessions, His greatest creations. He loves us perfectly. Yes we mess up, but we can repent. We can change! And we can be forgiven. If we aren't already, we can choose to be sexually pure and live a virtuous life. We just need to do our very best and have faith in our Savior, Jesus Christ. 

I'm so grateful that Dakota and I were married in the Temple and that we keep the law of chastity. It brings us closer to one another and to our Heavenly Father.